Marks Blog

W eight: 334.2 lbs (151.6 kg) BMI: 42.9 Waist: 55 in (139.7 cm) WtHr: 74.3% Breakfast: Bacon and Eggs Lunch: Mexican Ground Beef and Zucchini with Cottage Cheese Dinner: Pork Steak Drinks: 2x cups of Coffee Black, 500ml Bottled Water x4, Kroger Energy Shot x2, Kroger Seltzer Water Lemon Lime x5 Sober Week 1 (Day 9) Having a hard time the last couple of days getting up and going. Soreness in my lower right back. But it's more mentally struggling. I just couldn't get enough “Go” to go yesterday, but I did feel a considerable difference in the Mental and Physical energy yesterday. People were dumb AF but I'm starting to feel more “UP” on the days that I'm able to work out in the morning. Had Bacon and Eggs for breakfast after I got home from the YMCA. This is a very satisfying habit to get into. But I had used up the last of my bacon this morning and I forgot to pick up more bacon after work this evening. But I do have a Strip Steak in the fridge that I can have breakf

Weight: 335.2 lbs (152 kg) BMI: 42.9 Waist: 56 in (142.2 cm) WtHr: 75.7% Breakfast: Bacon and eggs Lunch: Johnsonville Jalapeno Cheddar Smoked Sausages Dinner: Rib Eye Steak Drinks: Couple Cups of Coffee Black,Several cans of Seltzer water of various flavors, Sugar Free Rockstar Energy Silver Weeks Sober 3 (Day 27) Stepdad looked at the car and it was the water pump that had went out. I do admit that he scared the hell out of me when he said that he was going to “Call a wrecker” after he determined that the problem was the water pump. He said that he put some antifreeze in and it just poured right out so he called a wrecker. I'm pretty sure that if I was linked up to an EKG it would have been writing in cursive. But he reassured me that the tow truck was just going to take it to my Granduncle's place for him to work on because it would be bad to drive it any more than absolutely necessary. Sounds like it's going to be an easy fix and it'll be done by the time I get

Weight: 335.8 lbs (153.5 kg) BMI: 43.1 Waist: 56 in (142.2 cm) WtHr: 75.7% Breakfast: Bacon and Eggs Lunch: Tootn' Chili Turkey Dinner: Baked Chicken Drinks: Pot of Coffee black, Kroger Energy Shot, Kroger Seltzer Water Cranberry Lime Weeks Sober 2 (Day 20) I did a bit of re-tweaking to the 2023 and 2024 weight loss tracking spreadsheets before work. For the 2023 spreadsheet I had the wrong number for the BMI goal. It was only off by 2.3 so not a big change and for the 2024 Spreadsheet I was going to change the Waist to Height Ratio tracking to Waist to Hip Ratio, but I've been doing Waist to Height Ratio for so long I think changing what WtHR means would just cause confusion. It's kind of unfortunate that both Height and Hip both start with the letter “H” otherwise it wouldn't be a big deal. Oh well, that just changes a thing that I was going to change back to the thing that I was already doing. And I'm very grateful for the “Find/Replace” tool on Open Office it

Weight: 338.4 lbs (153.5 kg) BMI: 43.4 Waist: 56 in (142.2 cm) WtHr: 75.7% Breakfast: Bacon and Eggs Lunch: Stroganoff Casserole Dinner: Strip Steak Drinks: Couple cups of Coffee black, Kroger Energy Shot, Sugar Free Rockstar, Kroger Seltzer Water Cranberry Lime Weeks Sober 2 (Day 19) Last night the meditation was kind of strange. I was able to meditate without falling asleep just fine, and I did feel calm after the breathing session, but the “Stress” tracker on my watch said that the level of stress that I was experiencing had gone up instead of down like in previous sessions. I did fall asleep quite easily last night. Strangely the app said that I didn't get to sleep until 2:30 this morning, even though I went to bed closer to midnight. That first doctors appointment when the doctor asked me how well I usually sleep I asked him how much he trusted smartwatches to track sleep, and he seemed to think that they are pretty accurate. Bit of a hard time getting going this morning.

Weight: 338.8 lbs (153.7 kg) BMI: 43.5 Waist: 56 in (142.2 cm) WtHr: 75.7% Breakfast: Bacon and Eggs Lunch: Taco Salad Dinner: Bratwursts Drinks: Couple cups of Coffee black, Kroger Energy Shot, Rockstar Pure Zero Silver Ice, Kroger Seltzer Water Watermelon, Kroger Seltzer Water Mango Weeks Sober 2 (Day 18) I guess that Queso Soup is bad for weight loss lol, I shouldn't worry about a daily fluctuation, but being up by four pounds in a single day is unfortunate. But considering that the waist hasn't gone up I'm just assuming that I'm just sitting on the food I ate yesterday (Tuesday). I got an email that showed the data of Yesterday's DXA scan. I got to say I DO NOT like the green blob of me laying there. I do have to say that I was surprised of the amount of fat that is in my legs. I knew that I had a serious gut that I had to work on, but I has always assumed that my legs were all muscle as I walk around all day almost every day. And my thighs have always been

Weight: 334.6 lbs (151.8 kg) BMI: 43 Waist: 56 in (142.2 cm) WtHr: 75.7% Breakfast: Bacon and Eggs Lunch: Queso Soup Dinner: Taco Salad Drinks: Pot of Coffee black, Kroger Seltzer Water Watermelon, Kroger Seltzer Water Mango Weeks Sober 2 (Day 17) Didn't sleep very well last night. Stayed up later than I should have to listen to the streamer that I like to watch on Monday nights. But when I did finally get to bed I had one of those nights when I jumped out of bed every time I laid down. I could just not lay still. I even tried to do the meditation, the notification disappeared from my phone before I got to bed. But every time I laid down my heart would race and my breathing started racing. It felt like a panic attack every time I tried to get to sleep. This has happened before, but it is a very rare occurrence. I'm not sure what causes this, but it doesn't happen enough to try to figure out. I was able to wake up early enough to eat the regular breakfast of bacon and e

Weight: 335.2 lbs (152.0 kg) BMI: 43.0 Waist: 56.5 in (143.5 cm) WtHr: 76.4% Breakfast: Bacon and Eggs Lunch: Center Cut Pork Chops Dinner: Baked Chicken Drinks: Pot of Coffee black, Monster Energy Zero Ultra, Kroger Seltzer Water Watermelon, Kroger Seltzer Water Mango Weeks Sober 2 (Day 16) I'm guessing that the “Relaxation Meditation” went really well last night as the last thing I remember was turning on the meditation app and then waking up at 8:30 this morning. Another day when I woke up I had a stiff headache. I'm really thinking that it's dehydration again. I haven't been drinking much of anything over the last couple of days. And as I got up and started drinking coffee I started feeling better. But then again I was drinking coffee, and coffee does tend to make people feel better. The last couple of days I've decided to drink the coffee black, I'm attempting to see if I feel any different with plain coffee than with the half cup of cream that I usuall

Tootn' Chili Weight: 339.0 lbs (153.8 kg) BMI: 43.5 Waist: 57.0 in (144.8 cm) WtHr: 76.4% Breakfast: Bacon and Eggs Lunch: Tootn' Chili Beef Dinner: Strip Steak Drinks: Pot of Coffee black, Kroger Energy Shot, 900ml water, Several cans of Kroger Seltzer Water Strawberry Lemonade Weeks Sober 1 (Day 13) As I was going to bed last night I got a notification on my phone that led to a meditation guidance thing. Which I really appreciate because I've looked up how to meditate before and a lot of them just seem to say, “Okay, just sit there and meditate” what does that mean? Well you sit there and meditate. How do you do that? Well, you just meditate. But last night there was a voice over that encouraged a breathing exercise? Regimen? Session? (I like session, I'll use that one) While reminding me to just focus on the breathing and not allowing the mind to wonder. It said to sit straight up and relaxed, but I did it laying flat in the bed with my arms to my side. I'm

Weight: 340.8 lbs (154.6 kg) BMI: 43.8 Waist: 57.0 in (144.8 cm) WtHr: 77.0% Breakfast: Sausage Patties and Eggs Lunch: Chicken Enchilada Soup Dinner: Bratwursts Drinks: Couple cups of Coffee black, Kroger Energy Shot, 900ml water Weeks Sober 1 (Day 12) Stayed up WAY too late last night trying to write a blog post. So I naturally slept in WAY too late. I had time to cook breakfast, but didn't do much else. Doctor says that getting up in the morning to try to get out into the sun is a good way to stave off the seasonal depression and I do have a small patio outside of my apartment so I have been thinking about buying a small table and putting a chair out there so that I can eat breakfast out on the patio and absorb some of the morning sun. But of course if I'm going to do that I'm going to have to start waking up in the morning. And as I'm writing this first part I'm needing to run out of the door three minutes ago. I was feeling alright before I left for work,

Weight: 338.0 lbs (153.3 kg) BMI: 43.4 Waist: 56.0 in (142.2 cm) WtHr: 76.4% Breakfast: Bacon and Eggs Lunch: Lazy White Lasagna Dinner: Queso Soup Drinks: most of a pot of coffee with cream, Kroger Energy Shot, 12pk Kroger Seltzer Water Mango Weeks Sober: 1 (11 Days) Can't seem to find the thought power to write anything in the last couple of days. And today would be really easy to make it a “Mark Whines About Work” blog. I had a lot of interactions that would have made good additions to the To Do list on Store Stories, but a lot of them were things that are already on there, the strange thing is that the list I've compiled over a decade or two is having so many examples in this last week or so. It's also strange that so many people are so Goddamned pissy. Which leads to the question as to if it's everybody around me or is it me projecting on everybody around me. Usually when I drop off on posting on the blog it means that I've fallen off the wagon again, but

Weight: 338.2 lbs ( 153.4 kg) BMI: 43.4 Waist: 56.5 in (143.5 cm) WtHr: 76.4% Breakfast: Bacon and Eggs Lunch: Tootn' Chili (Turkey) Dinner: Strip Steak Drinks: couple cups of coffee with cream, Kroger Energy shot, Sugar Free Rockstar, 2700ml water Days Without Beer 6 Was very excited this morning. This was the second month in a row where I didn't have any fees in my savings account and was able to pay all of the months bills on the first of the month. The fees that I have to worry about in the savings account are if you make more than two transfers out of the savings account online you are charged a dollar for every transfer (transfers you do at the bank in person don't count towards the fee). The other fee is that if your savings account ever gets under $100 in the month they'll charge you $3. One of my long time goals is to have all of the bills for the month paid on the first of each month. It is just so unbelievably satisfying to have all of the things paid off

Weight: 339.6 lbs ( 154.0 kg) BMI: 43.6 Waist: 56.5 in (143.5 cm) WtHr: 76.4% Breakfast: Bacon and Eggs Lunch: Pepperoni and Mozzarella Rolls with ranch dressing Dinner: Keto “Hamburger Helper” Drinks: pot of coffee with cream, Kroger Energy shot, Sugar Free Rockstar 12pk Kroger Seltzer Water Lemon Days Without Beer 5 Woke up with what felt like a hangover. Headache, stiff neck and muscles, foggy head. “Dr Google” says that “Phantom Hangovers” can happen days to months after quitting drinking. Then again it might just be that I need to buy a new pillow, the one I have now is quite old. Not quite as down today as I was yesterday. But still a little slow this morning. Wasn't looking forward to going to work. I am seriously getting tired of working with these “children” and everyday is just waiting for the day to get over with. Today was better emotionally for me than yesterday was, but going to work just feels so empty. Roommate is home this week. He was telling me about his ne

Weight: 341.2 lbs (154.8kg) BMI: 43.8 Waist: 57.0 in (147.3 cm) WtHr: 77% Breakfast: Bacon and Eggs Lunch: Southwest Style Detox Soup Dinner: Bratwursts Drinks: Coffee with cream, Sugar Free Rockstar, Kroger Energy Shot Days Without Beer 1      Hangovers suck. Woke up today with a desire to get going, but brain was throbbing in my head. And the in the concept of “Mind, Spirit, and body” In my mind I was wanting to get going, but in my body my brain was throbbing, and by shins and ankles hurt, and spiritually I just feel...flat for a lack of a better term. Is this what depression is? I woke up with a lot of mental energy, but low emotional and physical energy. The physical energy kind of built up as I got moving around, but the emotional energy just makes me want to lay down. I am kind of curious as to how depression is treated, as I think I've mentioned before, do they just hand you a “Happy pill” and tell you, “Have fun and good luck?” or is there more to it than that?      Ano

Weight: 346 lbs (156.9 kg) BMI: 44.4 Waist: 58.0 in (147.3 cm) WtHr: 78.4% Breakfast: Sausage Patties and Eggs Lunch: Kroger Kansas City St Luis Style Bake in Bag Ribs Dinner: X Drinks: Coffee with cream, 24pk Michelob Ultra Days Without Beer 0      Slept in really late, even for me. I'm not sure if there was something wrong with me yesterday. I am glad that I am off today because I was crawling out of bed this morning at almost 11:30. Woke up today much more well rested than I did yesterday. The only thing that I can think of is that maybe I was having a reaction to the Nathan's Hot Dogs. They brag that they use the same recipe for the last 100 years, but I do have to wonder if I'm having a reaction to the processed meat. But then again I don't seem to have any problems eating bacon, sausage patties, or the store brand bratwursts.      Had a really strange dream this morning. (mostly strange because I can remember it) I had dreamed that I was visiting a cursed cast

Weight: 343.8 lbs (155.9 kg) BMI: 44.1 Waist: 57.0 in (144.8 cm) WtHr: 77% Breakfast: Bacon and Eggs Lunch: 4x Nathan's Colossal Hot Dogs with mustard Dinner: Kroger Uncured Bacon and Cheddar Bratwursts Drinks: Coffee with cream, 2x Kroger energy shot, 2700ml water Days Without Beer 5 Woke up tired this morning and just could not wake up. This is not going to be a very long post I was a shambling zombie the entire day. People kept asking me if I was sick. I don't feel sick, I am just so damned tired. A coworker suggested that if I'm jumping back into the Keto diet my blood sugar might be getting really low. If this continues I'll have to try to bring this up with the doctor when I get my appointment in a couple of weeks. I got an email from the clinic saying that I have a secure message on their “Patient Portal” but that site seems to be having issues this evening. I'm really praying that the energy issues that I've had today isn't an indication of di

Weight: 343.4 lbs (155.8 kg) BMI: 44.1 Waist: 57.0 in (144.8 cm) WtHr: 77% Breakfast: Bacon and Eggs Lunch: 4x Nathans Colossal Hot Dogs with mustard Dinner: Baked Chicken Drinks: Coffee with cream, Kroger energy shot, 1800ml water Days Without Beer 4 Another day when I woke up well rested, but the urge to get out of bed was really low. The first alarm went off at 6am and if I had a bit more drive I could have gotten up then. But the question of “Get up and do what?” didn't have an answer. I really do need to find an answer for this question. Maybe getting up and getting some exercise or something. Maybe learn to do some stretches. Because as it is alarms go off at six in the morning and I end up going back to sleep because bed is really comfy and I don't have any reasons to get up in the morning. I did get out of bed a lot earlier than I normally do. 7:45 compared to the usual nine or so. But thinking about it that might just be because of the recent daylight savings time c

Weight: 345.8 lbs (156.9 kg) BMI: 44.4 Waist: 57. in (144.8 cm) WtHr: 77% Breakfast: Bacon and eggs Lunch: AI Marinated Grilled Pork Steaks Dinner: Chili Mac Drinks: Cup of coffee with cream, 8x Diet Mt Dew, 8x Diet Dr Pepper Weeks Without Beer 2 (16 Days)      I just realized it this morning, but once again I am off for the week on the week that is on the week that the Daylight Savings time changes. This tends to happen a lot. Just out of happenstance, I just happen to be off on the week that Daylight Savings Time changes. I'm flexible enough that it really doesn't effect me much. I had woken up at around 8am this morning (even though I had set my alarms for 6) that's not much off from the time I usually wake up. I did drive myself crazy for a while comparing the time it was and what it would have been without the time change. But I convinced myself to stop doing that because it'd just drive me crazy with how much time I “lost”. I think it's lost because it bein

Weight: 342 lbs (155.1 kg) BMI: 43.9 Waist: 57. in (144.8 cm) WtHr: 77% OMAD: Nachos Drinks: Couple cups of coffee with cream, 8 cans Diet Mt Dew, 8 Cans Diet Dr Pepper Weeks Without Beer 2 (15 Days)      Spent the first part of the day getting a Weekly Weigh In video done. Had a hard time getting the thoughts together. It was really quite distracting that the weight was up so much today. It shouldn't be a surprise that I weighed more today than I did last week as I overate on Mac and cheese and chicken breast last night for dinner. It is a frustration that once again I was up a rather large amount in the day I weighed in and it put me over the previous weigh in just a little bit. Today I was up 4.8 pounds for the day, but only 1.6 pounds for the week. Last time this happened I was up 5.8 pounds in one day and it put me up 2.2 pounds for that week. Seriously, why does this only happen on Sunday's when I'm doing the Weekly Weigh In?      I got the other two recipe vid

Weight: 337.2 lbs (153 kg) BMI: 43.3 Waist: 57.5 in (146.1 cm) WtHr: 77.7% Breakfast: Bar-S Jumbo hot dogs Lunch: Chicken Cordon Bleu Soup Dinner: Mac and Cheese with Baked Chicken Breast Drinks: Cup of coffee with cream, 500ml Water, Kroger energy Shot, Sugar Free Rockstar Pure Silver Ice Weeks Without Beer 1 (14 Days)      Not much to talk about today. I had set my alarms to try to wake up before dawn again. But again I just went back to sleep. I need to work on trying to get out of bed when my alarms go off. I had to work at 10 instead of 11 this morning and it kind of threw off the entire day. And I spent the entire day counting down until the end of the day as tomorrow I'm going back to vacation. I know that I had vacation a couple of weeks ago, but I am trying to use up all of my PTO before The Holidays start I'm trying to come up with anything to say about today, but it was just such a “beige day”      Feet and calves did hurt a bit in the morning, the calves did soo

Weight: 337.4 lbs (153 kg) BMI: 43.3 Waist: 57.5 in (146.1 cm) WtHr: 77.7% Breakfast: 6x Bar-S Smoked Sausages with mustard Lunch: Ground Beef Zucchini Casserole Dinner: Baked Chicken Drinks: Cup of coffee with cream, 1500ml water, 5 Hour Energy shot, Sugar Free Rockstar Weeks Without Beer 1 (13 Days)     Feet hurt again today and I'm feeling kind of mentally off. I've been really kind of pissed off the last day or two. I'm not sure what's going on with that. It's not that anybody is doing anything specific, it's just that my “fight or flight” seems to be ramped up. Maybe too many energy drinks? Or maybe it's the smoked sausages. I didn't look at the ingredients, but I'm willing to bet money that they have high fructose corn syrup in them. And I did have Mac and cheese for dinner last night. But that wouldn't explain why I was so irritable yesterday. I hope I'm not snapping at everybody I come across, but I have noticed that I AM TALKING